Everything sucks and then we die?

Look. We all know that 2020 has been a dumpster fire of epic proportions. Times are tough on all fronts.

It’s completely understandable if you are deep in your sympathetic nervous system (fight, flight, freeze) and feeling hopeless and helpless.

I get it. I just don’t want to leave you there.

Here are 2 quick tips to help you move out of that space and get a little relief (even if it’s just for a moment):

1. Move your body

Our sympathetic nervous systems (That fight/flight/freeze response) evolved to give us a physical advantage in a specific, short-lived life-threatening situation (like a saber tooth tiger), not to maintain that level of autonomic arousal for long periods of time because we are dealing with…I dunno…say a 4-year presidency and stressful election cycle, global pandemic, fear that queer and trans folk’s rights are going to be taken away/not given, a resurgence of the civil rights movement, and a global climate crisis. Y’all. That’s a lot.

In our modern society, our stress response cycle often doesn’t get completed because we are dealing with ongoing stressors or stressors that don’t require us to sprint away from or fight a saber tooth tiger. That energy gets stuck in our body and causes all sorts of problems, including increased anxiety, hyper-awareness, and body pain.

If you are able, engaging in some sort of "bursty" physical activity is helpful in moving that stress out of your body. Things like running, jumping jacks, pushups, biking, dancing, and anything that gets you a little sweaty and your heart rate up.

If that’s not possible for you, things like progressive muscle relaxation (where you tense all the muscles in your body starting at your feet and then let the tension go), deep belly breathing, and even visualizing yourself doing any of these things is helpful.

2. Gratitude & Wonder

Your ancestor is likely not the human who, while running from a saber-tooth tiger, stopped to smell the pretty flower along the way.

Our bodies do this really smart thing where, when they are in danger, they try to get. the. fuck. outta. there. Your brain shuts down all non-essential functions. Things like complex thought, gratitude, joy, beauty, and digestion.

That’s great news when we need our bodies to respond like that. It saves lives. The bad news is that our stressors today often don’t require that type of response and the fact that we often don’t get an opportunity to complete that stress cycle means that it’s tough to get back into a headspace where we can experience more grounded thought, gratitude, wonder, joy, and beauty.

Taking the time to be intentional about tapping back into those things sends our brains a signal that it can chill out a bit. Things as simple as having a mindful cup of tea, doing a "wonder walk" through your neighborhood where you take the time to really notice the things around you, and keeping a gratitude journal (it’s cheesy because it works).

Take some time to intentionally create a moment of wonder/joy/beauty in your life today.

I asked my Facebook group the other day about what positive things have come out of the pandemic for them related to their gender and they had SO MANY great responses.

What’s yours? Take a moment to jot some down in a notebook or your phone’s notes

Also, you’re #resilientAF whether you know it or not.


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